yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
