so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
