Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
