The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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