we have pet lesbian snakes
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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