bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
it was like eating out sand paper
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
