Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She announced her abortion via fbk
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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