there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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