Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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