If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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