tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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