Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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