I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Randomize
