We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
