hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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