I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
