You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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