If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
