She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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