that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
The air taste purple.
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