I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize