Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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