He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
There's even glitter on my cock...
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