Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
