Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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