U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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