he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize