he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I have post one night stand depression
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