I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
