Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
