Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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