I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
