I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
