Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
