oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
