thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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