Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
