The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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