Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
he told me I talked like a deaf person
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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