White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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