You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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