dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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