okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize