I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
i jhust puked up my retainher.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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