Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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