you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
