Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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