I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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