I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
