Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
